After taking a writing break in between yet another transition and stability, I was inspired today by a friend to write about “changes” as today’s topic of the blog. Today, May 19th, is the birthday of Malcolm X…an individual who was all about change. This blog won’t be about him, but I felt it necessary to honor the honorable. So Happy Birthday Mr. X.
I recently moved out of my first apartment that I moved into after relocating to Los Angeles for a new life. Herein lies the transition. I have experienced some of thee greatest changes in my life in the simple matter of one 365-day period. Pregnancy, motherhood, career, spiritual, social changes all at once. I love the definition of my life right now. Having a baby and being a mother have caused me to only seek out the simple in life. Although one might think that I was chasing Hollywood when I pursued the change, I realized that not only was I NOT pursuing “Hollywood” but I don’t even want it, at least not in the light that everyone thinks is so attractive and necessary. I was actually pursuing myself.
My bills have simplified to a few necessities; my need for luxury has been eliminated; and my desire to be the best person possible (both independent of AND dependent on someone else) is of the utmost importance. After not being able to wear my old clothes for nearly a year of my life, I so want a new wardrobe. And so one might think that the model in me requires me to be some bonafide fashionista. I beg to differ. Jeans that fit my new shape and shirts that accomodate my new need for accessibility (aka breastfeeding) is all that I require and desire these days.
My connection to God and all things spiritual has been heightened and enlightened throughout this experience. My holistic health is so essential that being in tune with the spirit world is top priority. However one might define that world is, in my new opinion, contingent upon who you are and need to be in order to access the spiritual. After justifying and defending my pregnancy and the right to womanhood for nearly a year now, my access to the spiritual means being in tune with my body; my relation to the necessary players in my life; the realness that I have and must possess for the sake of my own sanity; and the continued toothless happiness of the most vulnerable of life…my daughter.
Jeans and t-shirts are more than sufficient for my new mobility in life. And you can add a pair of fly earrings to that as well.
Welcome life!
